Borrowed Sorrow

  Growing up, I spent most of my time alone. I spent it reading, playing pretend, writing short stories, dancing, and exploring. Of course, I had a crew: a bunch of busybody teenagers exploring the infinite possibilities of our hometown. When puberty hit, I fell in love with the idea of falling in love, but not the actual relationship part. I mostly read about romance in teen magazines and already felt exhausted by the obligations society threw at girls. Back in my day, being sad was a trend. I was there when the first emo punk bands debuted on MTV. I was there when Avril swapped her skateboard for a tutu. But personally, I was happy. So, I borrowed sorrow from pop culture instead. I picked up my brother’s beat-up guitar and learned to play the most heart-numbing songs. I was an emo girl. The quiet kind you could only discover by reading my notes or scrolling through my playlist. I am a middle-aged woman now. What was once a borrowed sorrow has become the story of my life. Those c...

Coffee and Kisses: Watery


wa·ter·y
adjective
consisting of, containing, or resembling water.

I don't always put some lipstick on.
Or dressing up.
But I did tonight.
Usually to improve my mood.
And now for him.

Our last time together was a disaster.
His coffee, wasn't met his expectation.
So I'm getting ready to meet him.
But he doesn't want me.

I got water in my eyes.
My heart goes teary.
I said sorry.
He doesn't know why.
I said sorry.
That I ever want him.
I said sorry.
That I capable to hurt him.