Read This When You Want To Give Up

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 I keep listing the reasons why I can't kill myself. And each day it gets shorter. Still, I live. Liking my job, taking care of others, set goals, and actually achieved it. All while still wanna die. So I try to understand, what's exactly in my brain. What's I'm looking for. What's the drive that gets me up every morning. Why I'm in constant pain. Maybe I'm just dramatic, a little bit melancholy. I know what I want is for the pain to stop. And I need to know where the bleeding is to stop it. What and who hurts me. Or No matter what and who, when and how, I need to accept and forgive. Forgive that I can't change the past, I can't change people. Accept that I only can control myself. To tough up and not let it hurts. Maybe this is not about me. Maybe the what and the who weren't aware that they hurt me. It's like a circle. While they tried to protect themselves, they unintentionally hurt others. The fact that I wanna die since 4th grade and sti
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Talk the Talk, Walk the Walk

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'Saya nggak biasa dan nggak mau terbiasa kerja di luar jam kerja.'

Kalimat di atas emang biasa aja dan masuk akal. Jujur gue sedikit kesindir sih. Mungkin maksudnya emang nyindir gue? Hehehe.

Soalnya gue emang seneng banget tenggelam di tumpukan kerjaan. Kadang, pas lagi dalam perjalanan menuju manapun, trus ngeliat billboard atau curi denger percakapan orang, gue seakan dapet inspirasi buat artikel edisi depan.

Atau, pas lagi tidur, trus dapet ilham lewat mimpi, gue kebangun dan nulis itu. Jadi, iya. Gue nggak membatasi waktu kerja gue. Karena kalau nggak dicatet, ide-ide tadi bisa ilang begitu aja.

Sebenernya, nggak ada masalah. Gue mau kerja kapan juga. Tapi, ternyata banyak juga orang yang nggak suka ngomongin kerjaan di luar jam kerja. My bad. Lagian, maksud gue kan cuma ngasih info. Ngerjainnya yah nanti pas jam kerja.

Gimana yah, gue seneng sih sama jobdesk gue, jadi gue nggak ngerasa terbebani melakukannya kapan pun gue mau. Sure there is a slight different between doing something you love (which is something that involves a passion of yours) and loving what you do - even if it doesn't involve something you are passionate about.

Be passionate,
Shinta. (Oh, saya pun benci work overtime tanpa bayaran. Hehe)

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