soliloquy of solitude

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P.I.K

on June 22, 2012

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Jangan lupa bawa sunblock dan sunglasses kalo mau mampir ke Pantai Indah Kapuk

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Fresh Graduate Guide Into The Wild

Jika kamu adalah sosok baru di kelas pekerja, saran saya adalah luangkan waktu untuk berselancar di mesin-mesin pencarian. Kamu mungkin membutuhkan arahan bagaimana menulis CV dan mengirimkan lamaran kerja dengan tepat. Kamu mungkin akan menemukan tips-tips yang tepat untuk membuat CVmu cemerlang dan body email yang eksentrik sehingga recruiter melirik.

Namun bukan itu yang hendak saya bagikan. Setelah cukup lama menjadi buruh bulanan, saya semakin merasa bermusuhan dengan fresh graduate. Saya tidak akan menyematkan kata millenials karena mungkin saya adalah bagian dari itu. Jadi, ini adalah sekelebat uneg-uneg hasil menghadapi fresh graduate (dan anak magang) beberapa tahun terakhir.
Banyak nanya, bukan sering nanya. Kamu tau kakak-kakak di perkantoran itu udah stres dengan kerjaan mereka yang kok nggak selesai dan selalu ada revisi. Bayangin saat kamu lagi sibuk-sibuknya, terus ada temen yang nanya. Karena kamu baik hati, maka kamu jawabin. Lalu selang berapa lama mereka nanya lagi.…

What You Think You Know About Broken Heart

You know the story. A boy met girl, chased her, loved her, ignored her, and they broke up. I've been in that same old story, but always failed to see when did it went wrong. Was that I was that him, was that the timing or we're actually just playing. I never knew until now. The last time he called was to invite me to his wedding, 5 years after I weeping over him for chasing me for no reason, and leaving me when I was madly in love with him.

I wasn't ready. I was only twenty.

I never am the pretty girl, but boys frequently asking me out. Even I wear my heart on my sleeve, I knew we're only flirting. Whoever falls in love first, lose.

Love is addictive. Lovers fail to aware that they've become a junkie. Sometimes it never the person, it was the chemistry in your brain telling your body to crave for your partner. That's when you need a fix.

Until one of them decides they wanna quit. You'd think the one who calls it quit wasn't hurt, but they did. In breaking u…

A Head Full of Awful Things

I'm forcing myself to write. Since there are many awful things in my head. Forever grievings. Live in a pandemic. Constantly anxious.
But, I live well. Works okay. Occasionally laugh.
While still want to cut open my wrist.
I would never do that.
My body is not mine.
So I live well. Keep trying to eat clean. Meditate. Sometimes working out.
I know I'm not okay. Never in my entire life. I know I can't afford to be sick. So I cope.
Some nights it's worse than ever. Some night eyes won't close. Days feel longer. And miserable.
My heart feels like it would burst. My head spin. Tears flood like a river.
I'm not okay, still, I'm coping.
Some days are worse. For unknown reasons.
Coping is hard.

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